What to say at a celebration of life
You've been asked to say something, or you've decided you want to, and now the blank page. There's no perfect speech here - but there is a shape that consistently works, and a few things worth skipping.
Start with one specific thing
Not "she was a wonderful person" - everyone says that, and it tells the room nothing. Start with something only you would know: how she answered the phone, what he kept in the glovebox, the advice they gave you that you've never taken.
Specifics are what make people nod and then laugh and then cry, roughly in that order. Generalities make people wait politely.
A shape that works
One concrete memory to open. Then who they were to you, plainly - your relationship, not their resume. Then one thing you learned from them or will carry on. Then stop.
Two to three minutes is plenty. Almost nobody finishes wishing they'd spoken for longer, and a short honest piece is remembered far better than a complete biography.
Things worth skipping
The full chronology of their life - dates and jobs and addresses. Anything that requires context the room doesn't have. Anything you can't get through: if a story makes you cry every single time you've rehearsed it, it will do the same on the day, and that's fine, but have a shorter version ready.
And you don't have to speak at all. Plenty of people write something and ask someone else to read it, or contribute in another way entirely.
If words aren't your way in
Some people find it far easier to write a few sentences privately than to stand up in front of a room. A narrated tribute video is one way to do that - you write the honest, unpolished version of what you'd have said, and it comes back as a warm narration over their photos, in a voice that isn't yours.
Nothing is invented; the script is built only from what you write. Families often share it with everyone who came, and with everyone who couldn't.